The ridiculous rambles of a drunk twenty-something from Melbourne who does not need to be here.
• Butts rule everything around me
four and three and two and one
Too dumb to live, too gross to die
Anonymous asked: who are your top fans?
To dear IKEA,
You’re late with paying me. I’m very hungry and am craving pizza and beer, so y’know, you might wanna pay me for those 72 or so hours I worked/wasted in your big blue box establishment. I want to be full of pizza and dancing drunk to Bey/Tyler/etcwankerykbun.sdjflk.
Scarlett Johansson in Under the Skin (2013)
Housemate Megan gave me a beanie whilst drunk the other night, I don’t like my face without hair flailing about. Although I do look drunkenly happy.